Holding on to anger only keeps you in chains. Release the anger and set yourself free.
We all have so many reasons for being angry in this world that we must find reasons to “let it go” or “deal with it constructively”. Of course, it is important to feel the anger as it occurs but it is not that important to hold on to it.
What is anger?
Anger is a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure or hostility. It can range from a slight feeling of irritation to full on rage. Anger can surface when we feel betrayed, taken advantage of, hurt, insulted, and so forth. Our “fight or flight” emotions rise and we want to defend ourselves or someone else. But we have to be careful how we deal with the anger we feel because if we choose a less ideal solution, we can make the situation worse.
Ways of dealing with anger:
- Let it out (express your anger verbally-don’t hold it in)
- Count to 10 slowly (or 100 if you’re really upset)
- Take deep breaths or do some relaxation exercises like yoga
- Talk it through with an objective person (express your feelings)
- Do an unrelated task to take your mind of the issue for a few minutes (pet your animals, watch a comedy routine, go for a walk)
- Play some calming music to sooth your mind
- Visualize a dream vacation and take yourself there
- Repeat a calming phrase like “It’s going to be ok” or “I’m ok” (do some deep breaths with these)
- Forgive the person who made you anger (yes, this takes practice but it does work)
- Write about it in your journal (do not post it on Facebook or write a nasty text or email)
- Pray about it (if this is something that feels right)
- Allow some time to go by (don’t react right away because sometimes we can’t take back our first gut reactions or words)
- Say nothing (yes, the opposite of expressing it-sometimes you just need a moment to process what happened)
- Smile (your body will respond to this action-allow yourself to be “above” the situation)
- Get a hug or a kiss from someone you care about (be around someone you feel safe with)
Anger can be controlled so don’t let it get the best of you. If you practice some of these techniques on a daily basis, anger will start to elude you and peace will find you.
Wishing you all the best on this endeavor. I’d love to hear any tips you use to keep yourself in check. 🙂
Love and Blessings,
Coach Dina Blas
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© 2013 Dina Blas. Used with permission. Dina Blas is a Confidence Coach and Motivational Speaker in Dallas, Texas. Visit http://www.DinaBlas.com to learn more about her services and to request a free 30 minute phone consultation.
Dina Blas is an Inner Healing Coach, Reiki Master, and Meditation Teacher who helps her clients who have experienced childhood trauma break the toxic relationship cycle and rewrite their love story. Learn how to let go of your past and step into your power by contacting Dina today via her website www.DinaBlas.com or by email at Coach(at)DinaBlas.com.
I generally turn to prayer first. I find that it helps center me.
Ellen,
Wonderful! Thank you for stopping by. 🙂
Blessings,
Dina
I agree with Ellen about prayer, then I move on to exercise! Thanks for sharing!
Vanessa,
I like the way you think! 🙂
Take care,
Dina
Dina, I’m visiting from the UBC. I love your post! I especially like the technique of visualizing a dream vacation and going there. Ahhhh…
Btw, what is the YVYL in the oval at the top of your blog page? Blessings–
Kebba,
You’re awesome for stopping by and commenting. I hope this post reaches the people it needs to. YVYL stands for Your Voice Your Life…the name of my company. 🙂
Blessings,
Dina
Perfect timing today…thank you for visiting my blog…I shared your post on social media networks. 🙂
Melann,
I wrote this blog especially today so some would be able to cope. My prayers go out to everyone who needs it. Thank you for sharing it too. 🙂
Have a great evening!
Dina
It depend on what I’m angry about. Sometimes Prayer helps, or a chat with a trusted friend, sometimes just seclusion, but agree that acknowledging is important as well as letting it out, in a healthy way of course. Sometimes I do have to have a tantrum, so I hop in my car, take a long drive in the country, and let it rip until it passes, usually by the end I’m laughing about how silly it was, became destracted by the scenary or have a plan how to calmly deal with next time.
Great Info Dina!
Gin,
So glad you’re able to recognize what you need to do to calm down in your situations. It shows real maturity and growth. (((hugs)))
Take care my friend,
Dina
Anger can be very stressful, and damaging to the person who holds it. There are so many great quotes- and your ideas for how to lower the anger are great.
In my communication classes I say that when you are angry, 3 things are true:
1. There’s something that you want that you’re not getting
2. You’re telling yourself that SOMEONE SHOULD be giving it to you….
and here’s the anger part….
3. You’re about to speak or act in a way that virtually assures you WON’T get what you want!
Anger is a choice – just like happiness is! It’s nicer to be happy!
Thanks for your great post-
Lianda
Lianda,
Love your 3 points!!! Thank you for sharing them with me! 🙂
Blessings,
Dina