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Why Being Lonely is Never a Good Reason to Get into a Relationship

Dina Marie Blas — Tue, 11 Oct 2016 16:13:34 +0000

Everyone deserves to be with someone who really loves them and everyone deserves to have their own happy ending. I believe in this wholeheartedly. However, in order to have all of this you’ve got to be emotionally ready and mentally unattached to how this will all manifest itself.

There are many unhealthy reasons that women use to get into a relationship that can usually predict a miserable and toxic relationship as the outcome. However, it’s the deeper emotionally issues behind these reasons that are important to understand.

So why is being lonely never a good reason to get into relationship? Because no matter what you may think, a relationship built on insecurities and codependency can never truly have a solid foundation from which it can sustain real growth and prosperity.

Why you never want to get into a relationship because you are lonely:

You will send your desperate energy out into the world and therefore attract the same energy back
You will expect to find someone to “complete you” without even realizing that you are already whole just as you are
You will lose the opportunity to take time to heal yourself completely and unselfishly
You will make rash decisions based on the false belief systems you have been carrying around with you
You will behave in such a way that your partner will eventually realize that you are not a healthy person to be around
You will be taken advantage of by someone who likes to manipulate vulnerable women and you will let him or her
You will continue to get into toxic relationships over and over again and never find true happiness

So what should you do if you’re lonely?

Here are some tips to help you find peace with yourself when you’re alone.

Understand the reasons you feel the “need” to be around someone else
Get into therapy if your reasons make you VERY emotional that you cannot function
Hire a life coach if your reasons are manageable and you are ready to responsibility for your life
Make a list of activities you find enjoyable and start crossing them off your list
Make a list of NEW activities you’ve never tried before and take a chance of finding something that makes you feel alive
Take time to be alone and journal all the feelings coming up
Make new friends who share a similar background and do fun things together
Find a support group where you can talk about your feelings
Do physical activities to get the endorphins pumping (this will change your mood immediately)

The most important thing you want to understand if you’re lonely is that it is OKAY to feel lonely. It is just not okay to use it as a reason or excuse to get into just any relationship that will probably fail and leave you feeling even more devastated and disappointed.

Take time to heal yourself first. Don’t expect others to save you. No matter where you go in life or who you are with, the one constant person who will always be with you, is you. You cannot hide from her so honor her by finding ways to become the person you always wanted to be.

Live the life you love by projecting your inner beauty and confidence into the world. Heal yourself first. Get into a relationship second.

Wishing you the best on your brave new healing journey,
Dina Blas

How to Break Your Toxic Relationship Cycle

Dina Marie Blas — Sun, 11 Sep 2016 20:05:11 +0000

Do your romantic relationships keep you feeling exhausted and stressed out? Are you being mistreated in your relationship but decide to stay anyway? Do you date the same type of unhealthy person every time? If you answered yes to these questions, you may be stuck in a toxic relationship cycle.

So how do you get out of an unhealthy relationship? Before you work on this question, keep in mind these two thoughts.

First, acknowledge that you are making a choice to stay. Maybe you said yes to being in this relationship even when you saw the red flags or you stayed when you wanted to leave. There is no judgment or blame. This is just an acknowledgement. Second, look at how you attracted this type of person in the first place. There may be something about the energy you are putting out into the world that continuously brings back the same type of destructive person over and over again. Energy doesn’t lie.

So, in order to change this habit of attracting toxic people, you must first take the time to understand “why” you have this habit in the first place. It would be easy to tell you what to do but if the underlying reason or belief system is not addressed, it will keep happening. Right?

Now, I have to warn you. Going deeper means admitting what has happened to you in the past, taking responsibility for your own actions, and making a decision to change.

Let’s get started. Find a quiet and comfy spot; grab a pen and paper or your journal, and your favorite non-alcoholic beverage. Now, take 3 deep long breaths and tell yourself “I am strong, safe, and worthy of a healthy and loving relationship.”

The following process may dredge up some sensitive emotions and memories so please be gentle with yourself. Take a break if it gets too hard for you. Come back when you’re ready. And remember, the healing process is a journey, not a sprint. Ready? Let’s begin.

Step 1: Know your Toxic Cycles

Take one piece of paper and divide it into 3 parts. In the first part write “Step 1 – My Past Toxic Cycles” and I want you to list all the negative experiences and situations you’ve had in your life. Remember to list everything that pops into your head. Don’t be selective. Just dump it all out.

In the second part write “Step 1 – My Present Toxic Cycles” and I want you to list all the negative experiences or situations going on in your life right now. Include romantic relationships, co-workers, family, friends, situations, etc. List them all.

Finally, in the last part, write “Step 1 – Similarities”. Now look at both prior lists and find the similarities between your past and your present. For instance: Are you working at another job you hate? Are you dating the same type of man/woman? Did your mother yell at you when you were a child and now you are yelling at your children?

Take a deep breath. What did you find out about your life so far? Are there any patterns that repeat? Take note. What emotions were triggered? Write those down. No matter what you uncovered, this exercise is to help you become “aware” of patterns of behaviors in your life. That’s it.

Step 2: Taking responsibility

Now that you have found something(s) that keeps occurring over and over again, it’s time to talk responsibility. I know it’s easy to blame someone else for your unhappiness but if you take a closer look, you will realize that you were right there for each of your current situations. Again, there is no blame here. This is just an observation.

Remember, the past cannot be undone, edited, forgotten or erased. It can only be accepted.

So, take another piece of paper and write, “Step 2 – My Responsibility” at the top. Now I want you to look at ALL the romantic situations past and present from step one and list your role in each of them. What could you have done but didn’t? What did you allow but shouldn’t have? When should you have said “No”, but didn’t? And so on. Again, there is no blame here. You are merely identifying areas that need your attention.

The truth may hurt but it will help you heal. Owning and accepting your responsibility gives you an opportunity to change what you don’t like. Remember to take a few deep breaths to settle yourself.

Step 3: Making a commitment to change

As you can see, there is always more than one person responsible in any given situation. When you take charge of your life and own your actions, you are able to adjust the behaviors you don’t like quickly and effortlessly.

So what behaviors would you like to change? Yep, it’s time to grab a third piece of paper and write at the top, “Step 3 – My commitment to Change”. Now start a list of behaviors you’d like to change. For example: 1) I will no longer say yes when I mean no, 2) I will speak up with I am upset and not let it fester inside of me, 3) I will treat myself better so others will treat me better. Now it is your turn. Write as many as you can think of and then add more over time.

Having a written list like this allows you to have a focus point when you start to slip into your old habits. Remember, your situations won’t change unless you do. Your list should be quite long. If it’s not, you’re resisting the need to be a part of your own solution. Why is that? This is another question that requires some deep thought. Spend some time on this. Allow your feelings to emerge, as they will.

Step 4: Hire a life coach or therapist who specializes in this issue

Find someone you can work with you to go deeper and can provide a safe place to unwrap the emotions and situations you have held on to that keep you stuck in toxic relationships.

Having someone to vent to and explore these exercises in more depth will lead to drastic improvements in all your relationships, especially the one you have with yourself. Permanent and loving change is right around the corner if you commit to putting your needs first and allow yourself the appropriate time to heal.

Remember, in order to truly heal your wounds, you must move “through” that which you resist the most. When you do, the loving energy you emit into the world now will attract those with the same loving energy. If this happens, you will know something has changed.

Wishing you the best on your brave new healing journey,
Dina

How to Love Survivors of Childhood Narcissistic Abuse

Dina Marie Blas — Sun, 13 Mar 2016 20:43:32 +0000

As my partner stood talking at the doorway of the bedroom, all I could do is shut down and disappear into the world of my childhood. Her voice represented the yelling of my narcissistic mother screaming at me. Tears trickled down my face as I travelled back in time to the sounds of my painful childhood.

“Retreat!” constantly flashed in my mind whenever I heard my partner raise her voice. The louder her voice got, the more I withdrew into the past with my abusive mother. For more than 25 years, my mother filled my childhood and adulthood with criticisms and mockery. I never seemed to be “good enough” for her. Resigned to this notion, I broke free of her control in my 30’s and have been on the road to recovery ever since.

The healing process varies in structure and length for everyone. Encouraged by my partner, I allowed myself to express the hateful and sad feelings I had suppressed for all those years. As I hesitantly communicated my thoughts and feelings, the words came out jumbled and confusing, but I persevered. Patient with my efforts, my partner helped me bring my authentic voice to life and start the healing process.

Although improved, our relationship remained rocky because I kept my partner at arms length during our entire relationship. Her abrupt reactions to certain situations randomly triggered childhood memories of past abuse. This made it difficult to build trust between us.
After we broke up, we learned to openly and honestly talk about things that bothered us. The distance between us helped me ease into trusting her. The space allowed me to heal at my own pace.

Truly loving someone means holding on when you can but letting go when you must. Unknowingly loving a survivor of narcissistic abuse carries with it untold disappointments and resentments that may require professional assistance. I highly encourage everyone to talk openly about their past with anyone they plan to develop a long-term relationship. The decision to stay together should be made through a loving and compassionate conversation.

If you know your partner has had a difficult childhood, read the following ways you can help them learn to trust and love again. Remember, the healing process can take a lifetime. Your intimate walk on this journey together can lead you both to a healthy, caring and loving relationship.

How to gently love your partner:
1. Accept your partner for who she is. The good, bad and ugly. Love her for who she is and not who you want her to be.
2. Don’t try to change her or fix her. This is her personal journey, and she needs your support not your toolkit. She’s got enough pressure inside her own mind and won’t be able to handle anymore stress.
3. Understand your partner’s triggers. If you or she are unsure of the triggers, pay close attention to when she shuts down or becomes quickly agitated.
4. Don’t raise your voice especially when you are having disagreements. Getting angry and yelling will only have negative effects on the conversation and relationship. Keep your voice calm and level.
5. Be loving and generous with your touch and words. She didn’t get much, if any, of this growing up. She will appreciate it, but don’t be overwhelming.
6. Allow her to build trust over time. Give her all the time she needs. Trust is ONE of the biggest issues a victim of abuse will have in her life. Be patient and honest.
7. Take time to heal and work through your own issues. Projecting your own insecurities or jealousies onto your sensitive partner may hinder her well-being. Take time to give yourself some self-care as well.
8. Never blame, shame or guilt her in any situation whether it was her fault or not. She needs compassion and understanding right now. Have a cooling off period after a heated incident, then have an adult conversation. This means listening when she is talking, and talking when she is listening.
9. Don’t take her distant personality to heart. Pushing you away consciously and/or unconsciously is part of her current programming. Until it changes, this is a defense mechanism. She has been trained to do this from a very young age. Help her feel safe so she will talk to you about issues that matter.
10. Find out how she would like to be loved. Talk it through or use The 5 Love Languages by Gary D. Chapman to help guide you. It helped me tremendously. I wish I had it during my last relationship. My partner kept giving me gifts and cards (Her Love Language: Receiving Gifts), and they did nothing for me. I wanted her to do things around the house with me (My Love Language: Acts of Service). Had we known this, we may have been able to break through our walls a little sooner.

My list above represents many of the skills and tips I learned during my last relationship. I hope it helps you bridge the communication gaps with your partner.

Remember, always be kind and loving to each other. That’s what really matters.

Three Ways to Balance Your Life

Dina Marie Blas — Thu, 11 Feb 2016 15:51:00 +0000

When your life seems out of control and you’ve got endless demands tugging at you from all directions, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed, tired – and just plain stressed!

Believe it or not, balancing your life does not require massive changes. You don’t have to quit your job, abandon your family and escape to a remote retreat in order to feel peaceful and happy.

In fact, true balance is something that starts WITHIN YOU first and foremost – no matter what else is happening in your outer life circumstances.

And even though fear may try to stop you, don’t let it. Acquire a positive attitude and take charge of your life.

Below you’ll find three simple ways to begin building a greater sense of inner peace and harmony:

1) Quiet time

One of the first things we tend to sacrifice when we’re busy is our own personal time. Instead we devote all of our energy and attention to caring for others, multi-tasking, meeting responsibilities and “being productive.” Over time this depletes our energy and we begin to feel more and more burdened by our responsibilities.

To live a more balanced life, quiet time to yourself is CRUCIAL. You may believe that you don’t have any time available for yourself, but something amazing happens when you consistently MAKE time; you find yourself feeling happier and more energetic, your focus improves – and you still get plenty done. Just a few minutes spent sitting quietly in meditation or reading a book can do wonders in transforming stress into peace and happiness.

2) Self-care

Beyond making time for things you enjoy, there are other ways to nurture and love yourself on a daily basis. Getting a full 8 hours of sleep (or as much as you personally need) is a great start, as well as eating nutritious food, exercising daily and speaking kindly to yourself.

Have you ever noticed that when you’re really tired or stressed, even the smallest problem can rub you the wrong way? On the other hand, when you’re feeling well-rested and centered, you’re much better able to handle things that go wrong. Caring for yourself is one sure way to consistently replenish your energy, inner peace and joy – which means you’ll have the strength to handle whatever comes your way.

3) Flexibility

Did you know that one of the biggest causes of stress is having uncompromising expectations? We all do it from time to time; get a mental picture of how our lives “should be” – and get really annoyed when it doesn’t go our way.

One of the biggest gifts you can give yourself is the “opportunity” to decide to be flexible in most situations. In other words, learn how to detach from unrealistic expectations and go with the flow. What’s the worst that could happen? And even then, it’s not the end of the world. Don’t over-think the consequences of what “might” happen. Deep breath and release.

When you have a flexible mind-set, you’re able to deal with problems much more easily because you’re not working against a preconceived notion of how things “should be”. You’re able to tap into your creative problem-solving skills and move through challenges without all the drama and frustration. Be like a tree that bends with the wind and you’re much less likely to break.

These inner changes can make a dramatic difference in your state of well-being, but you may also want to examine your outer life circumstances and see if there are other small changes you can make to help support your inner work.

For example, you might choose to let go of certain obligations that are no longer meaningful or enjoyable to you. Just because you agreed to host PTA meetings at your house two years ago doesn’t mean you have to keep doing it forever – especially if it’s become a drain on your time and energy!

Be willing to let go of activities that no longer complement the lifestyle you desire, and you’ll create a space for greater fulfillment, joy and peace.

Love and blessings,
Dina Marie Blas

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© 2015 Blas International, Inc. Don’t forget to download Dina’s free ebook: 10 Simple Tips to Boost your Confidence Now! It will transform your life!

You are welcome to reprint or share any articles written by Dina Marie Blas as she offers her articles on a non-exclusive basis. However, the following Author information below must be printed at the end of each article. As a courtesy, if used on your website, the URLs must be linked to her site.

How to Conquer Your Fears

Dina Marie Blas — Mon, 30 Mar 2015 21:37:47 +0000

Have you ever felt so overwhelmed by fear that it prevented you from doing something you wanted to do? Has fear ever stopped you from showing people the real you? Believe it or not, this is a common problem faced by many people on a daily basis.

Fear has the power to hold you back from taking risks, being authentic, following your dreams, or becoming successful at anything you attempt to do. If you allow fear to take control, your quality of life will start to diminish, you can sink into a deep depression and you can feel stuck and unable to make decisions.

What many people fail to realize is that fear is nothing more than a conditioned response to “not knowing”. It’s a natural reaction to a frightening or unfamiliar situation. While it is usually automatic, there are things you can do to overcome it.

1) Check your expectations.

One major contributor of fear is the existence of negative expectations. Do you usually find yourself expecting the worst in every situation? Do you worry obsessively about what could go wrong, rather than focusing on your strengths and capabilities?

Make a conscious effort to have no expectations, or at the least expect good things to happen. If you expect nothing, you can’t be disappointed. If you anticipate and look at the positive side of each situation and it doesn’t go your way, at least you wouldn’t have wasted unnecessary emotions on worry. Having expectations can set you up for failure. So why not just let the chips fall where they may and deal with it then?

2) Get control over your imagination

The majority of things you fear will never come to pass anyway. It’s a fact. If you look a little more closely at your fears when they arise, you may be able to dismiss them one by one.

Fears arise due to our unknowing of how a situation will play out. So, we make up all sorts of scenarios and of course, most of them are absolutely ridiculous. Our imagination is our worst enemy in situations we are trying to avoid.

So why not ask yourself when you are placed in a situation of fear if the fear is actually warranted or if you’re creating an excuse not to do or face something. Ask yourself if you are unnecessarily adding “drama” to your situation so you won’t have to follow through with it. You’ll be surprised by what you discover.

3) Do the very thing you fear.

Did you know that fear is merely an emotion or feeling? It’s true. It can’t harm you and you can choose to ignore it completely and move forward. Think about that for a minute. Fear is an emotion. There is nothing tangible about it. It is created in your mind and felt by your body. Period.

Now that’s not to say that you have to completely ignore your fears. After all, fear is a survival emotion. It is supposed to warn us of dangers, etc. But most fear in today’s world is self-inflicted. So in terms of these fears, you can weigh your options in any given situation and then make a decision based on the real facts (not your fabricated facts).

If you tackle your fears head on, you’ll find out how quickly your courage will turn into confidence and that’s always a good thing. So empower yourself to know that fear is easily overcome and attempt to do the very things that scare you (without being life threatening). Good luck!

Love and blessings,
Dina Marie Blas

How to Develop a Positive Attitude

Dina Marie Blas — Wed, 11 Feb 2015 19:49:24 +0000

The quality of your life depends on the attitude you choose to have everyday. Whatever you focus on the most, you manifest, whether by choice or by intention.

Have you ever known someone who had a terrible attitude? Perhaps they were extremely negative and pessimistic and not much fun to be around; or they complained non-stop about how terrible their life was. Did you find it draining to be in their presence?

A negative attitude will not only make you miserable, but everyone around you too. So why would you choose a negative attitude?

A positive attitude, on the other hand, turns you into a person that everyone wants to be with; a person that constantly experiences great things, and a person who loves their life! Do you want to be that kind of person? If so, read on for some easy ways to develop a positive attitude.

1) Do what you love. This applies to hobbies and fun activities, but it also pertains to one of the biggest parts of your life your work! Do you enjoy your job? Are you spending most of your time on something that makes you feel purposeful and fulfilled? If not, consider exploring other career options and moving toward a job you’ll love. When you regularly do things that make you happy, you can’t help but feel better about yourself and your life, which fosters a positive attitude.

2) Expect the best, always. It’s easy to get into the habit of seeing doom and gloom in every situation, but doing so keeps you forever focused on the negative. Instead, make a conscious decision to expect the best, even if your first impulse is to think negatively. Affirm as often as you can, “This is going to work out great! Wonderful things are going to happen today!” The more you do it the more you’ll begin to believe it, and the more you’ll begin to experience just that.

3) Build yourself up. Think and speak positively to and about yourself every day. Most of us are in the habit of talking down to ourselves, which leaves us feeling hopeless, frustrated and pessimistic. Get into the habit of building yourself up with positive self-talk and positive thoughts. Affirm your good qualities and downplay your negative qualities. Affirm that you are a work in progress; not perfect but great nonetheless!

4) Build others up. As often as you can, make an effort to encourage, support and compliment the people you encounter each day. That goes for people you know as well as strangers you meet in your daily travels. The more you focus on emphasizing the positive in others the more likeable you’re going to be, and the better you’re going to feel about yourself too!

5) Think strength. The more you worry about your weaknesses and failures the more pessimistic and negative you’re going to feel. Instead, consistently affirm your strengths, talents and capabilities. You’ll end up feeling empowered and in control of your circumstances, which cannot help but improve your attitude!

Love and blessings,
Dina Marie Blas

Have You Checked Your Self-Talk Lately?

Dina Marie Blas — Mon, 12 Jan 2015 21:49:56 +0000

Did you know that you talk to yourself all day long? No? It’s true.

And it’s not just about activities, family, friends, or chores that you need to remember throughout the day either. Even though that’s a form of self-talk too, I’m referring more to the things you say to yourself “about yourself” on a regular basis; and more importantly, the tone in which you say them.

When you make a mistake, do you berate yourself angrily? Do you put yourself down or call yourself derogatory names? When you have a hard time making positive changes in your life, do you put yourself down and call yourself worthless? Do you eventually conclude that you’ll never do anything right?

Negative self-talk can be incredibly damaging to your self-esteem and confidence, especially if it’s a big part of your daily life. When you keep putting yourself down over and over again, eventually you begin to believe the thoughts running through your head.

Most often these messages begin as statements uttered by the adults in your life when you were a child. They may have said something negative about you when your actions displeased them, or perhaps they had a habit of saying unkind things even when you didn’t deserve it. As painful as these experiences can be, even worse is when you pick up where they left off and keep repeating the same negative messages to yourself over and over again.

Don’t be so hard on yourself. Even though you may not have been the one to start the negative self-talk, you can be the one who stops it.

So, the good news is that you can change your self-talk any time you want. It’s merely a decision you have to make. Become aware of the negative thoughts and tone of the messages you are sending yourself and consciously replace them with more encouraging ones.

Try these 3 simple steps (with a small notepad or journal):

Step 1) Develop an awareness of your self-talk. It may take practice, but if you keep listening in to your inner voice, you’ll begin to notice when you talk negatively to yourself. With a small notepad or journal, every time you catch yourself putting yourself down, write it down. Answer these questions: What was the situation? How did you react? Later take time to reflect on each situation and ask yourself “Why did I react that way?” Write down your honest feelings and explore them.

Step 2) Challenge the negative messages. When you notice yourself saying something negative such as, “You’re such a screw-up” or “You can’t do anything right”. Stop yourself and challenge that belief. Is that really true? In your journal, continue exploring each situation by asking yourself, Where did these words come from? Who said them to me? When did they say them to me? Why do I believe them?

Step 3) Replace the negative messages with positive messages. When you realize you’re saying unkind and untrue things to yourself, simply turn it around. Write down in your journal or notepad what you would like to say instead and say them out loud. Yes, out loud. Get your physical body involved. At first you may hesitate because you’ve never said such nice things about yourself but don’t back down. You deserve to hear these amazing things. For example, you might say, “Wow, that’s not true at all! I do plenty of things right. It’s true I make mistakes, but so does everyone. I’m a good person and I try my best. That’s good enough for me.”

Over time, your efforts to curb your self-talk will pay off in the form of stronger self-esteem and respect for yourself. You will try more things and you won’t mind making mistakes. Even though it probably won’t happen overnight, the more you work at turning your self-talk in a more positive direction, the better you’ll feel about yourself.

Love and blessings,
Dina Marie Blas

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© 2015 Blas International, Inc. Don’t forget to download Dina’s free ebook: 10 Simple Tips to Boost your Confidence Now! It will change your life!

Be Happy Now!

Dina Marie Blas — Thu, 01 Jan 2015 19:53:49 +0000

Are you still waiting for your circumstances to change before you’ll allow yourself to be happy? Are you waiting for the “perfect” moment to occur? Most of us have preconceived ideas of what would make us happy, and we refuse to be satisfied until those things happen.

The problem is that even once specific things happen in our lives, we’re rarely satisfied with them! Instead, we shift our focus to something even bigger and better, believing it will make us happy (or happier). We never allow ourselves to reach a point of contentment. Have you done the same thing to yourself?

The good news is that you can decide to be happy NOW even if everything in your life is not perfect. Shocking I know but it’s true. Below you’ll find 3 easy ways to do so:

1) Be grateful. Gratitude is one of the most powerful states of mind that you can adopt. Not only does it make you feel good, it shifts your focus from what you don’t have to what you DO have, and keeps it there! As you focus more on what you are grateful to have in your life (even the really small blessings!), you worry less about anything that may be lacking. The result? A more pervasive sense of happiness! In my previous blog, I tell you how to create a Gratitude jar for every month of the year.

2) Take time to smell the roses. If you spend most of your days feeling rushed and scattered, it’s hard to feel happy and content. In order to be truly happy, you need to make time for yourself to relax, dream, and take pleasure in life’s simpler moments. Beginning today, remember to press the “pause” button every once in a while and take in the amazing moment right before you. Allow it to sink in. Use all your senses to fully experience it. You can also start to spend time doing things you love on a regular basis. Read books that stimulate your imagination; listen to great music; take long walks, and generally make an effort to enjoy your life as it is right now.

3) Love the journey. Many of us make the mistake of pinning all of our expectations on some vague, far-off result, like the completion of goals. We believe that once we get there everything will be perfect and we’ll finally be happy. However, there is much to be gained from enjoying the journey TO your destination! Make it your mission to revel in every moment that you’re working toward higher goals. Notice the people in your life who are along for the ride. What new skills and experiences are you learning from. Realize how quickly challenges turn into victories when you finally see the silver lining. Enjoy the sense of self-mastery and accomplishment you gain with every goal you achieve. Make it a worthwhile journey and you’ll savor the end result that much more!

The most important thing to understand about happiness is that it is largely a CHOICE you make from moment to moment. Though certain serious situations make it difficult to feel happy at times, most often we allow the little things to bother us and block any happiness we would otherwise feel. Understand that life is merely the balancing of good and bad. Nothing more. So always anticipate that everything will go well but if it doesn’t, know that you will overcome and keep going.

So go out there and embrace happiness and let it grow to magnanimous proportions in your life!

Love and blessings,
Dina Marie Blas

How to Create a Gratitude Jar

Dina Marie Blas — Mon, 10 Nov 2014 23:31:45 +0000

With Thanksgiving right around the corner, “Gratitude automatically becomes the new Attitude” in November. And rightfully so.

As a Life Coach, I’ve seen firsthand the positive effects gratitude can have on a person’s life. This is why I personally make this a part of my daily ritual.

While Thanksgiving is a wonderful time of year to have this change of heart or perspective, please remember that you always have reasons to be thankful each and every day of the year.

I realize life can be challenging at times and can seem very unfair. But the fact that you are here, right now, reading this, tells me that you want to find more ways to appreciate all that life gives you.

In order to do that, you must first understand there will always be a balance in life. To appreciate the good, you must walk through the bad. To feel love, you must endure sadness. This balance will always exist so it is up to you to find a way to stay on the positive side of every situation.

How do you do that? One way is to create a sacred space to hold your positive and inspiring thoughts of gratitude as you move through each day. By doing this, you will hold on to the amazing energy manifesting from your positive thoughts and keep them close to you.

Supplies you will need to create your jar:

*Glass jar
*Ribbon, colored paper, etc.
*Cut up paper to write your gratitude on
*Heaps and heaps of gratitude

Instructions on how to fill your jar:

1) Sit in a quiet place and take a few deep breaths.
2) Ask yourself, “What I am grateful for today?” and then pause.
3) As a thought presents itself, take one piece of paper, write it down, fold it and put it into your jar. (Optional: Put a date on each gratitude sheet)
4) When you are done with all your current gratitude thoughts, put the jar by your bed side.
5) Then every evening before you go to bed, go through steps 1-3 again.
6) Repeat everyday for 30 days.

At the end of 30 days, it will be time to revisit all the amazing things that have brought you joy or happiness in your life. Find a quiet place again, sip on your favorite hot chocolate or tea, and read each piece of paper again to yourself.

As you fill your heart with beautiful thoughts and love over and over again, you will start to expand yourself and your energy fields to embrace and accept more gratitude into your life. If you hadn’t noticed, the more you are grateful for what you have, the more you are given to be grateful for.

This is the natural course of the Law of Attraction (like attracts like). So whatever you want “more” of in your life, this is where your focus must be and stay.

And since gratitude is an attitude and therefore contagious, feel free to share your experience with others (your partner, children, best friends, etc.) If you can help one other person find more things to be grateful for, the world will automatically become a more loving and peaceful place.

Love and blessings,
Dina Marie Blas

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© 2014 Blas International, Inc. Don’t forget to download Dina’s free ebook: 10 Simple Tips to Boost your Confidence Now! It will transform your life!

Daily Affirmation – Loving Relationship

Dina Marie Blas — Tue, 30 Sep 2014 18:14:44 +0000

Relationships take work to work.
It is not enough for us to expect others to be who we want them to be when we want it.

We must be ready to be our best selves as well. Two healthy individuals make for an amazing
relationship filled with communication, collaboration and trust.

Answer the questions below to help you uncover some of the answers that will help you move forward.

Questions to ponder:

1) Who am I holding on to that no longer serves me in my life today?

2) What can I do today to become the person I know I am on the inside?

3) What can I do today to start the process of putting myself and my needs first?

Answer truthfully and your world will start to become a more loving and welcoming place.

Love and Blessings,
Dina Marie Blas

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© 2014 Blas International, Inc. Don’t forget to download her free ebook: 10 Simple Tips to Boost your Confidence Now! It will transform your life!